What Do You Yearn For?

When was the last time you stopped to think about what you’re truly yearning for? Not the stuff you think you want—like a new car, a bigger paycheck, or a better body—but the deep-down, soul-level stuff that really matters.

Wants are easy to name: the house, the vacation, the fancy coffee maker. But late at night, when it’s just you and your thoughts, is that really what you’re craving? Probably not. Most of us yearn for things like peace, joy, belonging, or freedom—feelings that can’t be bought or wrapped up in a bow.

Wants vs. Yearnings

Here’s the thing: your wants and your yearnings come from very different places. Wants are tied to your social self, the part of you that’s been shaped by what you’ve been told you should have or do. It’s the part that’s never satisfied, always chasing the next thing.

Yearnings, though? Those come from your essential self. That’s the unedited, real you—the version of you that existed before the world told you who to be.

Your essential self is who you were as a kid. It’s the part of you that just is. It’s not about what you’ve achieved or what you’ve got. It’s about how you feel. And reconnecting with that version of you? That’s the magic.

Finding Your Core Self

So how do you tap into that deeper part of yourself? It’s not as complicated as it might sound. Try this:

Meditate: Sit still for a few minutes and just listen. No agenda.
Journal: Write down whatever comes to mind. Let it flow without judging it.
Visualize: Picture yourself feeling peace, joy, or whatever you’re craving.
Create: Doodle, paint, play music—whatever gets you in the zone.
Walk: Get outside, move your body, and let nature do its thing.
Pray: Talk to whatever higher power you believe in, or just to yourself.

All of these practices help you tune into your essential self. They’re ways to get present and feel what’s really going on inside.

Listening to Your Core Self

Your core self speaks to you all the time—you just have to listen. It communicates through your intuition, that gut feeling that’s hard to explain but impossible to ignore. Intuition isn’t logical; it’s felt. It’s the quiet nudge that says, “This feels right” or “This isn’t it.”

It also speaks through your needs and yearnings. And yes, you do have needs—it’s part of being human. Recognizing and honoring those needs is how you start living in alignment with who you really are.

Living in the Energy of Your Yearnings

The beautiful thing about your yearnings is that you don’t have to wait to feel them. If you’re yearning for peace, for example, you can start creating moments of peace right now—through your breath, your choices, or your environment. These feelings aren’t tied to your circumstances. They’re available to you anytime.

Contrast that with the ego, which is all about wants. The ego chases external stuff: “If I get this, then I’ll be happy.” But here’s the truth: even when you get the thing, it’s never enough. The ego always wants more. Your essential self, though? It’s about being. It’s about feeling fulfilled right here, right now.

Flowing With Your True Self

When you focus on your yearnings and let yourself feel them, you move into a state of flow. In that state, life feels easier. Things start to align. And funny enough, the stuff you thought you wanted often shows up as a byproduct—not because you chased it, but because you tapped into the energy that attracts it.

I’ve checked a lot of boxes in life. I’ve got a house, a car, money in the bank. But none of those things have brought me the kind of joy I feel when I’m truly at peace, or when I’m connected to my core self. That’s the kind of fulfillment that lasts.